When the Preacher's Wife Went Crazy

I have been blessed to know some terrific pastors' wives. This time of year coupled with a photograph triggered some wonderful memories of one of them.

Susie Crowley and Halloween

             Recently I was perusing some of Angie’s photographs of memorable church activities. What a delight to find the one below of Susie and John Crowley. This photograph was taken in October of 1978, at a youth party hosted by Barbara Rice for the youth class that she had just begun teaching. She planned it as a fun activity for the youth – a costume party. Susie Crowley, the pastor’s wife, dressed as a crazy doctor and had John, the pastor, in tow as an unwilling patient. Susie is now deceased, but I have such treasured memories of her. After her death, I spoke with John about her. She was bubbly and always had an infectious laugh. Her whole face smiled. John agreed with me that she was the funny one in their marriage and he was more serious. It was a perfect balance.

Susie Crowley dressed as a crazy doctor injecting her patient/victim, John,
her husband who was pastor at Ralston Baptist Church from 1974 through 1978.

             One of the most telling memories of Susie occurred at Falls Creek, a summer youth camp. Following a torrential rain that Falls Creek is famous for having, the older cabin in which we were staying flooded. The kitchen and dining hall were the primary areas that had several inches of rain flowing through them. We began helping the sponsors bail out the water. What an arduous task! Susie was her easy-going, humorous self even amidst these mini-crisis situations.  After lots of bailing, the water was still flowing. Susie just grabbed a cookie sheet, sat down on it, and laughed hilariously as she slid across the slick floor. She taught a great deal about how to handle a seemingly impossible situation.

               Susie was a perfect example of a couple of verses from Proverbs. In Proverbs 15:13a we read, A merry heart makes a cheerful countenance… and then  A merry heart does good like medicine...from Proverbs 17:22a. I believe strongly one of the most successful anti-aging procedures is putting a smile on my face. Just look in the mirror without the smile and then be amazed as you see the years vanish when you break into a smile. The results are incredibly effective for impacting your facial appearance and even more so internally in lifting your spirit. Susie Crowley knew this so well.

Susie Crowley laughing even when photographed putting
on her makeup at Falls Creek.

                Over the years, many people have indicated that their lives were impacted in a lasting way because of the influence of John and Susie during the  mid 1970s. Several others have told of life-changing experiences with the Lord during John Crowley’s ministry at the Ralston Baptist Church. John consistently preached the Bible and encouraged his congregation to live out what they learned. Talented, funny, easygoing Susie was the godly woman supporting him as he ministered effectively in the community.

Typhoid!

           Around 1910, Edmund Gates, Sr. was living in a tent on the Sherman Deal place northwest of my parents’ farm. (For more about my grandfather’s experiences as a tent dweller see the blog post entitled Calamity in a Tent posted on March 30, 2014.) Obviously, the living conditions would have been primitive to say the least. Grandpa contracted typhoid fever. How he got the bacteria called Salmonella Typhi is unknown. He could have been exposed to a human carrier, may have drunk contaminated water, or eaten food washed with contaminated water.
         At the worst point of Grandpa’s illness, his temperature was 105 degrees Fahrenheit accompanied by severe stomach cramps as well as a headache.  Nettie Black, his future mother-in-law, did all she knew. She gave him morphine. (Pharmaceutical history shows that at least one teething remedy sold over the counter in the early 1900s was over 50% morphine according to the National Institutes of Health website! This product was removed from the market in the 1930s.)

Nettie Ann Venator Tripp Black,
the mother-in-law of Edmund Gates, Sr.

         Upon ingesting the morphine, Grandpa passed out. Bob and Nettie Black loaded him in the wagon and started to Ralston. However, the doctor met them at the Bates Place now owned by the Hightower family. It is located about a mile east of the Belford Bridge that spans the Arkansas River. Dr. M. W. Gaymon, a doctor practicing in Ralston at the time, asked Edmund, Sr. how he felt. Under the influence of the morphine he answered, “Fine!"


A Couple of Other Accounts Relating to Contaminated Water and Typhoid 
(Aren't we blessed to have filtration and purification systems today?)


Since typhoid fever develops due to impure water, it prompted my father, Edmund Gates, Jr. to recount this personal memory when he was relating the above account to me. Dad recalled how frequently toads fell in the well’s opening or casing underneath the slab. He said the water didn’t taste bad but smelled awful. The water looked clear. They would go to the windmill well for drinking water if it got too bad before they could “pull and flush” the well near the house.

Ruben Hopper was friends with my maternal grandfather, Calvin Callcayah “Cul” Smith beginning in their home community of Hickory Grove, Oklahoma, located in the eastern part of the state. In his later years, Mr. Hopper shared with my mother that his mother died when he was quite young due to typhoid fever contracted by the use of water from a contaminated cistern.

Grave marker at Hickory Grove Cemetery
in Delaware County of Mr. Hopper's mother.
 A distant relative of my mother's told me that the
 land for this cemetery was donated by Calvin
Callcayah Smith's great-grandmother, Susan
Spaniard Smith Miller who came on the Cherokee Trail of
Tears in 1838. Many of Grandpa's relatives are 
also buried in this same cemetery.

Celebrating the Newest Nonagenarian in the Family

Bernyce Smith Gates, my mother, will be 90 years old on October 17. Nine decades of exceptional living are worth celebrating!

Nine Decades

1^st Decade 1924-1933 The first time I remember meeting Travis Myers, he related this account to me. Travis, who is about five years older than Bernyce Smith Gates, my mother, said when he was around 12 years old, he accidentally knocked her down on the way home from Belford School. He told me that as he towered over her, my mother, a spunky, small , seven-year-old, “got him told” about how he should have been paying attention to what he was doing and then would not have run over her. Mother vaguely remembers this happening.

2^nd Decade 1933-1943 Mother graduated at the top of her class in eighth grade in 1939 from Belford Grade School and had the highest grade average as a senior at Burbank High School in 1943. 

Mother as a teenager

3^rd Decade 1944-1953 Mother worked in a temporary capacity at the First National Bank in Burbank, Oklahoma. She was filling in for the bank president’s wife while she went to be with their daughter who was having a baby. Shortly after that, Mother was offered a permanent position at the bank, but instead chose to marry Edmund Gates, Jr. on March 4, 1948.

The First National Bank building in Burbank, Oklahoma. At the time of this
photograph, the building was a residence.

4^th Decade 1954-1963 Mother gave birth to both my sister, Angie and me and became the epitome of a fulltime, dedicated wife and mother. The myriad of Mother’s tasks ranged from designing and sewing a winter queen costume when Angie sang the lead role in a school Christmas program, encouraging daily piano practice to daily preparing (always before the sun came up which didn’t jive with her personal sleep pattern) a lunch for my father to take on the job with him. She insured he always had a hot dish, chilled fruit or ice cream, and something to satisfy his sweet tooth in his lunch box. Mother’s average day began around 5 a.m. and ending well after midnight.

Angie during her final fitting models the
Winter Queen costume created by Mother .
 This was for the Christmas program
at the Ralston Elementary School.

5^th Decade 1964-1973 My sister’s “family” booklet that she compiled in second grade begins the section about her mother with this sentence, “My mother works.” Mother never worked a day outside the home during our upbringing. However, she canned 52 quarts of green beans yearly, preserved all other vegetables my grandparents and my dad raised in the garden. She made butter from the milk given by the family milk cow. It was the task of Angie and me to turn the handle of the Daisy churn until the butter “came.” She prepared three balanced meals each day for my grandparents, my father, my sister, and me.

6^th Decade 1974-1983 For several years, Mother lovingly cared for both her parents until her father’s death in October, 1982, and the death of her mother in May of 1983.
7^th Decade 1984-1993 When my grandparents died, Mother decided this was a time in her life to do what she most wanted to do so she embarked on intensive Bible study to prepare each week for teaching the adult women’s class at Ralston Baptist Church.
8^th Decade 1994 – 2003 One of Mother’s great accomplishments was losing a total of 80 pounds over several years. She has retained a healthy weight up to the present.
9th Decade 2004 – 2013 In August of 2011, Mother recovered from gall bladder surgery in a remarkably, short time. She experienced a blockage requiring an ultrasound that detected an unrelated mass in December of 2011. A malignancy was discovered in January of 2012. In February of 2012, her oncologist reassured our family that surgery would be the answer for the tumor because it was identified so early. The successful surgery was on March 20, 2012, and yet miraculously, she was ready for Dad to come home from rehabilitation a week later. We still give thanks for that painful blockage.

Bernyce Smith Gates

On March 4, 2012, Mother and Dad shared their 64^th anniversary dinner in his hospital room. One of his nurses, in her 20s, commented about what the secret was to the longevity of their marriage. Mother responded, “Well we are both Christians and have tried to put the Lord first in our relationship and Edmund has been easy to get along with.” Most of those who know her will agree she is quite a remarkable woman herself.

Happy 90^th Birthday, Mother!

A Frightened Mama and Her Baby at the Red River

 It is my hope that family stories of courage, strength,  and perseverance amidst fear-filled, dangerous situations will propel us through our own 21st century storms and difficulties, especially we women who descend from Rosa Jarrell Rainey.

Crossing the Red River

                In the last half of the 19^th century, the railroad was the fastest mode of transportation. This burgeoning industry could hardly construct railways quickly enough to meet the clamor for connecting the United States and its territories.

                William Marion Rainey and Thomas J. Rainey, his father, joined the force of sturdy, strong men laying the rails in Texas. (The first blog post about William Marion Rainey was posted on October 20, 2013.) William had married Rosa Jarrell Rainey in Bloomfield, Missouri, on December 19, 1889. While my great-grandfather and my great-great grandfather were working in Texas, Rosa, my great-grandmother, stayed busy cooking for the hardworking men on their crew. (For more about Rosa go to the blog post entitled  The Matriarch of the Rainey Family posted on September 29, 2013.) Amidst all the rigorous demands on this young couple, their first baby was born in Texas on September 30, 1893. They named her Daisy Dean.

                Then Bill Rainey, as so often happens today in the 21^st century, followed the job opportunities. He crossed the Red River into Indian Territory, leaving his wife and baby daughter behind in Texas. So in 1894, Rosa, pregnant with her second child, clutching Baby Daisy in her arms, crossed the Red River in a wagon. I recall my grandmother, Gladys Vivian Rainey Smith, telling me of her mother conveying vividly how challenging and frightening this ordeal was for her.

                What a brave 26-year-old she was! She most likely crossed at the traditional ford of the Chisholm Trail near Terral. The National Weather Service’s hydrograph of the Red River near Terral shows a range from a low of 6+ feet to 22 feet at flood stage for this crossing.  

Source: http://www.blogoklahoma.us/place.aspx?id=608
This marker was placed to mark the crossing by  the
Historical Society of Fleetwood
Terral, Indian Territory (Oklahoma)

               The Chicago, Rock Island, and Pacific Railroad Company had begun construction of the railroad in the Chickasaw Nation in 1892. (http://digital.library.okstate.edu/encyclopedia/entries/J/JE002.html) They laid the tracks alongside the old Chisholm Trail that had been used by the cowpunchers for so many years during the cattle drives that culminated in Abilene, Kansas.

                Whether it is a mention of the Red River Rivalry or someone traveling from Texas north or an Okie going south toward the Bluebonnets, often at those times, I think of the courage of my great-grandmother, reins in hand, traveling with her precious little baby. As she approached the Red River, tension gripped her muscles. The burden of responsibility for her baby girl, the team of horses, the wagon containing all their worldly goods, and her unborn child weighed heavily upon her. Rosa tried to steel herself to her worries and anxiety, hummed nervously a lullaby to Baby Daisy Dean, and plunged the team of horses pulling the wagon into the murky water. What relief she must have felt as the strong steeds pulled the wagon with all her family’s belongings onto the Indian Territory side of the riverbank!

                On December 10, later in the year, Rosa gave birth to Lewis Elbert Rainey, her first son, in Terral, Indian Territory. The newly formed railroad town was only a couple of years old. According to my grandmother’s personal, handwritten family records, it was while Rosa and Bill were living in Terral that the two of them were converted and then baptized by Reverend Parker.

              In light of this information, my heart goes out to that frightened, young ancestor of mine, who had not yet experienced the peace that Jesus brings when our lives are committed to him. Great-grandma Rosa didn’t yet have a relationship with the heavenly Father to whom she could pray and ask for strength and safety as she forded the Red River with tiny Daisy. Possibly the paralyzing anxiety and utterly debilitating helplessness she experienced as the horses splashed through the muddy water, straining to draw the heavy wagon onto the dry ground caused Great-grandma Rosa to begin to realize she needed strength beyond her own ability. Later when she heard Reverend Parker’s sermon in July of 1896, she and my great-grandpa responded to God’s work in their hearts. It is my prayer that those of us who descend from this couple will be sensitive to God’s quiet work in our lives and affirm our need to follow Jesus. No better legacy would this pioneer couple desire!