Is Regifting Even an Option After 21 Years?

Regifting

            Late on Christmas night, I dug deep back into one of the lower level kitchen cabinets searching for a vintage Tupperware turkey storage container. During my search for this seldom used rust colored plastic container, I discovered mini-bread pans and two bread tubes that I hadn’t laid eyes on in years.

            The next morning, I was a little wider awake. After breakfast, I began investigating the rediscovered bread baking utensils. I remembered baking in the mini bread loaf pans in the days I was teaching, but not the bread tubes.

I opened the flower- shaped bread tube and pulled out a small leaflet with interesting recipes. I handed to Mother the sheet with various recipes. Then, I turned my attention to the second box that held another canape bread tube in the shape of a heart. Mother’s handwriting had written on it: from Bernadean  12-19-98.

I opened one end of the box to see if it had the same canape bread recipes. To my amazement, the shiny Pampered Chef Valtrompia Bread Tube (in the shape of a heart) remained encased in its original plastic covering. Mother had never opened it!

            I exclaimed, “Mother, you have never used this tube. You haven’t even opened it!”

Without a moment’s hesitation, she asked, “Do you want to regift it?”

            I responded with a slightly elevated voice, “Mother, I can’t regift it. I gave it to you. You would have to regift it.”

She glanced at me sideways and immediately said with conviction, “Well, I wouldn’t want to hurt your feelings.”

We stood in the kitchen and laughed uproariously. Several times during the day that one-two minute exchange brought smiles to our faces and laughter into the room.

Upon reflecting about this day-after-Christmas conversation about a gift given 21 years earlier, thankfully, Mother and I were able to turn what could have been a sticky situation into rib-splitting laughter. 
Over the last seven years of returning to live at the farm, I have learned Mother prefers sophistication and elegance in her attire when leaving the farm for church or any other place. On the other hand, tastiness is the main goal in her cooking which, even at age 95, continues to be par excellence. Those canape bread tubes are far too frou-frou for her. I now question why I ever gave her something so impractical for her kitchen. (However, one of my resolutions for the upcoming year is to use the Pampered Chef Valtrompia Bread Tubes to bake at least one loaf of canape bread in the flower shape and another in the heart shape.)

Another thing I have learned upon returning to the farm is to not take situations too seriously. Mother laughs about everything. For over 50 years, she has quoted this verse to me. Maybe I am beginning to learn to live by it.

A merry heart does good like a medicine.

Proverbs 17:22

A Christmas Remembrance of Masham Youth

                Almost on a weekly basis, my mother, Bernyce Smith Gates, mentions, with admiration, some remembrance of the young people at the Masham Baptist Church in the late 1950s-early 1960s. She always characterizes them as “good” young people. Teaching these “good” teenagers, over 60 years ago, continues yielding an ongoing reward to her.

                In the latter 1950s, Pastor Ray Hart led some committed Christians to begin the Masham Baptist Church. He had pastored previously the Big Bend Baptist Church in the Big Bend community.

                Brother Hart implored my maternal grandparents, Calvin and Gladys Rainey Smith, and my parents, Edmund, Jr. and Bernyce Smith Gates, to come across the river and join the believers seeking to form a congregation in the Masham area in Pawnee County. He quoted from the passage of Paul’s vision in Acts 16:9 -10, using the words, “Come over to Macedonia and help us.”

                In verse 10, Luke wrote “immediately we sought to go to Macedonia, concluding that the Lord had called us to preach the gospel to them.” After prayerful consideration, the four of them joined forces with the little flock in the rural community of Masham across the Arkansas River in Pawnee County.

                Almost immediately after joining the newly formed church, Mother and Dad began working with the youth of the church. Dad taught the Sunday School class for the teen boys with Mother serving as the teen girls’ Sunday School teacher. At that time Dad was 35 years old with Mother at 30 years of age.

                Recently, Mother located a remembrance of their Masham young people 61 Christmases ago. She found the names of 20 teenagers who purchased a beautiful, blue wool blanket as a gift at Christmas in 1958. Mother had written these names: Elaine Wills, Charles Wills, Gordon Laird, Vonnie Laird, Janice Wolfe, Lance Ben Mitchell, Larry Mitchell, Nancy LeForce, Sue Schultz, Paul Warnock, Tony Warnock, Wayne Robbins, Roy Lee Robbins, Kenneth Woolery, Mary Jo Thurber, Reynolds Thurber, Johnny Thurber, Delbert Zolduske, Beverly Bright, and Linda Bright. The thoughtfulness of these young people continues warming Mother’s heart. 

Mother identified so many faces but here are the names that she could recall:
Beverly Bright, Dorothy Wills, Loretta Wills, Vonnie Laird, Nancy  LeForce, Gary
Moon, Sue Schultz, Janice Wolfe, Wayne Robbins, Lance Ben Mitchell, Roy Lee
Robbins, Paul Warnock, Bro. Jim Warnock, Gordon Laird, Mary Jo Thurber.
Dad is on the front right. This was taken in 1957. Mother is assured some of
these "young people" can identify every person in the photo.

                Mother preserved some snapshots taken during youth parties a year earlier in 1957.  Three of the photos have parents photographed during the parties. Most of the parties were hosted by parents inviting them into their homes. Usually the hosting family provided the refreshments.

Sue Schultz and Delbert Zolduske with Bea
Mitchell, a parent sponsor, smiling in the doorway

The young people anticipated playing silly, but fun games. One was a rhythm game which incorporated claps, pats, snaps and involved players calling numbers. The game demanded attentiveness and coordination. Another favorite activity called Airplane tricked the blindfolded player to think they were “flying.” Mother recalled these high school students had much fun and the photos confirm it.

In warm weather, they played outdoor games. Mother commented she could outrun all of them when playing “Flying Dutchman” with them. She can only dream about those days now as a nonagenarian!

                This era shines brightly in Mother’s memory because of committed parents who had taught their children to respect and obey them. These same parents willingly involved themselves in their high schoolers’ activities. They set and taught standards they expected their young people to uphold. As a result, she and Dad worked with teenagers open to the commands of God’s Word and easy to chaperone at parties.

Ernest Robbins, a parent host, and Reynolds
Thurber enjoying the eats.

Mother recalls Larry Mitchell, Janice Wolfe,
Nancy LeForce getting a laugh as she gets taken
in one of the games. The girl standing on the
right is unidentified.

                Mother, at age 95, hopes “these young people” (all of whom are in their 70s and 80s!) continue to hold to the Biblical truths they learned at the Masham Baptist Church. The never-changing principles will steer all of us through the tumult of the 21^st century. The Christ we celebrate at Christmas is to be honored by our words and our obedience all year round. Each of us can impart to the youth of today the relevance of the same truths learned by these “good kids” over six decades ago.    

Sue Schultz and Charles Wills participating  in
a fun game.

           

  Mother wishes a blessed Christmas to the Masham Young People of yesteryear and success as they impact their children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren in the principles of the Lord in 2020.

Other Links of Interest:
https://bernadeanjgates.blogspot.com/2015/04/easter-sunday-and-60-cent-trio-book.html

https://bernadeanjgates.blogspot.com/2018/07/not-putdown-but-badge-of-honor.html

Larry Mitchell, Roy Lee Robbins, and Wayne
Robbins (back to camera) take Beverly Bright on
the airplane ride.

Vonnie Laird, Roy Lee Robbins, Sue Schultz, and
others enjoy a good time

Gordon Laird, Roy Lee Robbins, and Paul
Warnock enjoy a "pop" - a rare treat

Memories Around a Timeless Children's Christmas Carol

                As Christmas approached, I pulled some music from the Christmas section of the many shelves of music above the little spinet piano where I often practice. In my hand was a vintage Little Golden book. 

                My earliest Christmas memories included that Little Golden Book since I have always loved music, including Christmas carols. At age three and four singing was never enough but my musical enjoyment often included dancing and playing my tiny piano.  

            I flipped the Little Golden Book open with surprise to see printed neatly “Angela Gates.” Never as meticulous as my sister, she had felt the need to take ownership of the book. I taught her the formation of letters when she was just three. Being more haphazard than Angie, I was quite a bit older before I began putting my name on books or music I owned. As we grew up, we shared printed music such as our piano lesson books and all other music in our household.

                The pages most imprinted on my little mind from the little Christmas carol book featured young angels in colored robes with wings tinted in pastel hues. Having been taught the story of Jesus’s birth from my youngest days, I knew angels didn’t dressed like this, but was drawn to the colorfulness. The second verse of “Away in the Manger” appeared on those two pages. How I loved that song with its expressive motions illustrating the message of the perennially-loved children’s Christmas carol! These words lodged in my mind, encapsulating the fathomless love of Jesus, His presence at the right hand of His Father in heaven, and yet present with me each night as a sleeping little one:

I love Thee, Lord Jesus! Look down from the sky,

And stay by my cradle till morning is nigh.

                 How thankful I am for parents and grandparents who took the opportunity of Christmas to introduce us to the coming of the Savior. As all children, the glowing lights, sparkling ornaments, vibrant colors, delicious baking smells and beautiful music heightened our excitement. The adults in our lives purposefully steered us in learning of the incomprehensible descent of the perfect Son of God into our world to redeem imperfect, undeserving humans. With tender hearts, we embraced the beauty and truth of the Baby Jesus coming solely to love the unlovable. My parents and grandparents believed the words of Jesus when He said, “Let the children come to me.”

                One of the foremost English pastors of the late 19^th century preached a sermon entitled “Come Ye, Children” in 1897. Charles Haddon Spurgeon, the prince of preachers, spoke forthrightly to his parishioners with these words -

Anything we do to hinder a dear child from coming to Jesus greatly displeases our dear Lord. He cries to us, “Stand off.  Let them alone. Let them come to Me, and forbid them not.”

                This Christmas let’s commit to remind ourselves and those we meet, especially the little ones, of the precious Messiah whom we celebrate this season. Look for creative sights, smells, tastes, and sounds, especially music, for deepening our relationship daily with the Christ of the Christmas season. That's the real way to celebrate!

Remembering Lewis Rainey on His 125th Birthday

This week will mark the 125^th birthday of Lewis Elbert Rainey. According to the records of my grandma, Gladys Rainey Smith, her older brother, Lewis, was born on December 10, 1894, in Terral, Indian Territory, just north of the Red River.

Four months before Lewis’s 6^th birthday, his family expanded with the birth of my grandma. At times, they appeared to have an adversarial relationship. Both exhibited strong wills, wickedly active minds, never-say-die work ethic and unyieldingly ensconced opinions. When they were kids, Lewis accused Grandma of ruining his nose when she hit him with a hammer. She related of similar incidents aimed her direction from her big brother.

The work ethic of Uncle Lewis and his wife, Aunt Pearl Bierman Rainey, knew no bounds. I recall as a preschooler how they spent several days helping us relocate to our new home in 1961. Mother recalled vividly Aunt Pearl carrying quart after quart of canned vegetables and fruit into the refurbished cellar at the newly built home.

Recently, Rick Rice brought a box of keepsakes he had received after our great aunt’s death. Aunt Emma Buckley had saved an article about Uncle Lewis and his older son, Leo. The article entitled Fertilizer and Good Farming Restore Land to Production written by Ramon Martin appeared in an issue of The Farmer Stockman in 1950. Since Aunt Emma, Grandma’s younger sister, resided and worked in Washington, D.C. at that time, I think Grandma may have mailed it to her.

Photo from the Article

The article indicated Uncle Lewis purchased a 160-acre “farmed-out” parcel of ground in 1932 in the middle of the Great Depression and the worst drought Oklahoma ever experienced. No one had much hope for productivity for him with this “worn-out” land. Within 22 years, he and his older son, Leo, had increased the land farmed to 1,134 acres. By 1950, they owned 320 acres and leased 814 acres.

Osage County agent, A. A. Sewell characterized Rainey’s operation as “a perfect example” of building “worn-out land…into highly productive land.” He included Uncle Lewis’s farm on every farm tour he led.

His remedy for reclaiming the land featured terrace building, planting Bermuda, and growing cowpeas and later planting sweet clover. Of course, his early years of reclamation predated mechanized farming in the Bend so he utilized teams of horses. He also applied tons of lime and rock phosphate as well as fertilizer.

I worked on this blog posting in conjunction with reading the book, Dirt into Soil by Gabe Brown, a North Dakota farmer who is a proponent of regenerative agriculture. As I read this quote from Uncle Lewis, I realized his strategies for successful farming mirror to some degree Brown’s 21^st century approach.

Cowpeas are the best soil builder for field lands. Bermuda is best for stopping erosion. I wouldn’t farm without both of these crops, Bermuda and cowpeas. I figure cowpeas are the cheapest fertilizer any farmer can plant.  – Lewis Rainey

In his later years, this self-made successful man was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease. As his condition worsened, he and Aunt Pearl moved from the Bend to Pawnee. The summer prior to his death, my grandparents went almost daily to visit. Grandma and Grandpa even picked the abundant crop of peaches from the tree in their yard. Grandma helped Aunt Pearl process and freeze those delicious peaches while Grandpa visited with Uncle Lewis.

Grandma loved her brother dearly and admired what a success he had become. Yet she knew in his early adult years, he told her of "breaking up" a fight between two preachers. That incident turned him from valuing spiritual truths and most things associated with the church. That pained Grandma since she had embraced wholeheartedly her relationship with Jesus. She prayed faithfully for him.
 Almost coinciding with Uncle Lewis's last summer, Grandma found a modern translation of the New Testament. He accepted the copy of Good News for Modern Man when she gave it to him. Her decades of prayers were answered when one of the most respected farmers in the Bend and more important to her, her beloved older brother said, after a few days of reading, “Now I finally understand the Bible.”

Afterthoughts - Uncle Lewis’s grandson-in-law, Lester Anson, still lives in the Bend. Mark Anson, Uncle Lewis’s older great grandson continues the farming endeavor begun by his great grandfather. Numerous times, I told Ethan, Kelsey, Bailey, and Logan, the children of Dawn and Mark Anson, how much Uncle Lewis and Aunt Pearl would love them and revel in their accomplishments.

Bailey and Kelsey in 2010

Logan in 2010 

Ethan Anson, age 17 after winning 2010 Football State
Championship in Class A (I think this was left on Mother's
refrigerator so long it may have gotten water damage - but I
liked the photo and the memory.)

A Deteriorating Stable and a Couple of Polaroid Photos

…You shall love your neighbor as yourself…

Over and over this phrase appears in God’s Word. The phrase appears in these eight verses (Leviticus 19:18, Matthew 19:19, Matthew 22:39, Mark 12:31, Luke 10:27, Romans 13:9, Galatians 5:14, James 2:8). Clearly, Jesus taught the value of the people who are around us.

The Dilapidated Stable

Over the last few years, I have stumbled upon items Dad made. Without use and maintenance, things fall into disrepair. One example is the stable Dad crafted for our church’s simplistic, but meaningful depictions of the nativity. Numerous little Marys and Josephs have stood, sat or knelt in the shadows of the quaint, little stable. Yet as is evidenced by the photograph, it can no longer be used and is ready to be discarded.

            Jesus warned about earthly stuff being susceptible to “moth” and “rust” destruction. This happened to the little stable constructed by Dad. Then I located a couple of pictures.

Front: Shawna Crowley, Darren
Crowley, and Leona Tanner
Back: Charlie Knifechief and Frank
Burch

Front: Dale Bledsoe  and Lee Bryant
Bledsoe  Back: Kendall Richardson

The photographs were taken following one of the children’s performance in the church Christmas program during the 1970s. They have grown into responsible adults -educators, a school superintendent, Bible teacher and numerous other honorable careers. (Lee Bryant Bledsoe III, a Desert Storm veteran, still lives in the Bend.)
Some of these young people conveyed at Dad’s death what an impact he had on their lives from teaching some carpentry skills to sharing small snippets of wisdom for living life to always having a cheerful, personal greeting for them. Countless times I heard Dad say, “I like to teach a young man.” Nothing meant more to Dad than encouraging a young person.

            Earlier I mentioned about the warning of Jesus from the chapters denoted the Sermon on the Mount. In Matthew 6:19-20, we hear our Savior's command,

Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal;

But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither mother nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal.

Jesus said not to focus and put our primary attention on the earthly stuff like the wooden stable. Instead the all-important vision of reaching out to people must grab our interest and time.

                At the outset of this post, I listed eight passages that commanded the love of “your neighbor” – anyone who crosses your path. People – our family, our neighbors, our coworkers, and anyone who comes into our periphery– become our emphasis if we obey Him. As we enter the Christmas season, let’s remember to emphasize people as we encourage, teach and share the love of Jesus with them. What better gift could be given to the Savior whose birth we celebrate!

Lord, as we launch into this season celebrating Your miraculous entrance into our world, help us to treasure what You treasure. You treasure individual people. You chose to come into this world to bring salvation to those who would receive You. Never let our concern for selecting or purchasing gifts blind our loving care for the person receiving the gift. Give us hearts for valuing people as You do. Only then will we have made room in our hearts for You this Christmas season.