Lost in the House

          In March, a roller coaster ride described the week we had with Mother’s health. Elevated temperatures and severe chilling episodes culminated in another ambulance ride. Thankfully, her EMTs while unloading her at the hospital told how Mother cracked jokes on the way, comparing the ambulance trip to a roller coaster ride. The intravenous fluids she received seemed to help immensely. Once again, no major red flags waved. She came home.

          Angie had stayed four days and three nights. As she packed to return home on the fourth day, she couldn’t locate her glasses. We began searching for them not wanting to awaken Mother. Then Angie spoke softly, “My wedding ring is not in the leaf.”

Photograph from the wedding album
of Angie and Ben. They exchanged 
rings and vows on May 28, 1994.

          Normally, Angie stored her wedding ring in a leaf-shaped dish on the table next to her bed. We both silently prayed for God to enlighten our eyes to the two lost objects – one much more valuable than the other.

          Suddenly as I passed Mother’s bed, I spied the missing glasses. I quickly took them to Angie. I silently prayed, Lord, You know where Angie’s ring is. Please open our eyes to the ring.

          God faithfully helped us find Angie’s ring. I raised my hands in thankfulness as Dad would have done. God showed lavish grace in allowing us to locate the missing items.

          I remembered Dad often recalling Brother Ray Hart’s message, “Lost in the House” based on Luke 15:8-10 whenever something was lost in the house. Jesus told this parable of a woman who had lost one of her ten silver coins.

          According to Biblical notes, these ten coins were drachmas. This Greek word indicated a coin equivalent to a day’s wages. In our 21^st century way of thinking, the garland of the ten drachmas belonging to a married woman would equal a two-week paycheck. The woman’s loss of this coin in Jesus’s parable might be comparable to the disappearance of a stone from a wedding ring set which represented a substantial loss.

          Just as Angie and I turned on lights, the woman lit the lamp. We searched carefully just as the woman had done.

          The lost coin didn’t find itself. Just as the woman initiated the search, God was the one seeking for lost souls. The woman wanted the coin to be back in its rightful place on her garland of coins symbolizing her marriage. God desired that humans live in fellowship with Him – their rightful place.

          Jesus compared her joy at finding the lost coin to the joy in the presence of the angels over a sinner’s repentance. Jesus stated, Likewise, I say to you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.

          Jesus did not say the angels rejoice. He declared the joy was in the presence of the angels. I told Mother I believe our loved ones who died in Christ praise joyfully every time a human here on earth responds to Jesus with a life-altering commitment.

Upon hearing of the episode of Angie misplacing her wedding ring, Ben
suggested "Just wear a slicone ring when you work at the farm." After 30 years,
Ben knew their commitment to each other didn't depend on an external symbol.
Just as believers in Jesus, the marriage relationship is illustrated by the respect
and commitment day-to-day in our obedient actions.

Happy 30th Wedding Anniversary!

Remembering a Bender Who Traveled Far and Wide

Our friend, Lou Brock, shared some family photos with us recently. It seemed the perfect time to pay tribute to his father. Included are some of the photos from Lou’s collection. 

Wheeler in the 1930s.

              Today seemed appropriate to remember a Bender 47 years after his passing on May 19.1977. Wheeler Eagle Brock’s original family home was on land adjoining my mother’s farm at her northeast corner and the Brock land’s southwest corner. Wheeler’s mother, Lavaria, was an original Osage allottee.
                My maternal grandma, Gladys Vivian Rainey, formed a bond with young Wheeler when as a young woman she was employed by his mother, Lavaria Wheeler Brock. Grandma mastered the preparation of traditional grape dumplings after foraging the “possum” grapes from vines near the Arkansas River in the early fall season. I never tasted a bowl of grape dumplings that rivaled those Grandma made. The sole reason stemmed from the “wild” grapes rendering a richer, more robust flavor. This dish remains a standing dessert for the

Wheeler's parents, Lou and Lavaria 
Brock with Mildred, Wheeler's wife in 
the 1950s.

Osages, Cherokees, Chickasaws, and Choctaws when observing the traditions from the past.
                Wheeler served in the Merchant Marines. He sailed across the equator or in other words, sailed down under. Wheeler wore a tiny gold earring as a carry-over representing his extensive sailing while serving in the merchant marines.
                Wheeler chose Mildred Holman with whom he would spend the remainder of his life. They both loved to laugh, but Millie seemed to more frequently find the witty side of situations. Wheeler’s dry humor complemented Millie’s laughter-infused responses.
                When Wheeler retired from teaching in other states and countries and returned with his family to the Bend, my grandparents enjoyed many visits with them. Grandma frequently declared to Wheeler in those conversations how he was a favorite of his mother. His sensitivity, love of learning, and thoughtfulness endeared him to his mother.
                His son, Lou, stood as one of his chief accomplishments. Wheeler and Mildred fostered and nurtured their son’s love and God-given musical talent. For many decades, Lou blessed the Ralston Baptist Church as he played the organ and sang. 

Wheeler with his son, Lou
in the 1950s

Once the church had a guest preacher on a Sunday night. The attendance was sparce, but the retired pastor commented, “I thought I was in a much bigger church” based on the music to which Lou laughed heartily.               

                Wheeler respected and valued his Osage heritage. Ironically, this week I observed anew three of the buffalo wallows on Mother’s southwest side of her farm. Mrs. Floris Brandenburg reminisced to us in her class during elementary days of the buffalo wallows that dotted Osage and Pawnee counties as she urged us to cherish, remember, and learn from the past. Wheeler did just that. As so many of us who descend from different cultural backgrounds, we learn to honor each ethnicity that has made us who we are as Wheeler did.

A beautiful Indian
Paintbrush plant
blooming at the edge
of one of the smaller
buffalo wallows this
week.

                The overarching truth of our lives remains as Moses reminded in Deuteronomy 10:17: The Lord your God is the God of gods and Lord of lords. He is the great God, mighty and awesome, who shows no partiality and takes no bribes. Then the Apostle John wrote in I John 2:2 He (Jesus) is the sacrifice for our sins. He takes away not only our sins, but the sins of all the world. May we emulate the God who created and sustains us by responding with no partiality. Wheeler’s life advocated and demonstrated this principle. May our lives as well.

Celebrating Mother and Her Smile

               

Frequently, at age 99, my mother, Bernyce Gates Smith, is complimented on her beautiful smile. This Mother’s Day seemed a good time to explore what contributes to it.

The few photos of Mother until this
senior portrait were very somber - much
like Grandpa's portrait.

                First, genetics passed from her Cherokee descent plays a huge role. God blessed Mother and my maternal grandpa, Calvin Callcayah Smith, with a full mouth and beautiful, straight teeth. These physical traits had to originate with Grandpa’s father, Walter Smith. Mother’s cousin, Elizabeth Purcell Hammer, and I visited many times before her death at age 103. She told of her family living briefly with her maternal grandparents after her family’s house burned and spoke of her grandpa encouraging her and her sisters to dance as my grandpa and his brother, Isaac, played stringed instruments. Immediately, I asked her who Great grandpa Walter resembled. She said, “Your grandpa looked like him more than any of the others.” I deduced Mother’s “mouth” initially “belonged” to her paternal grandpa, since he was categorized as full blood and must come through her Cherokee heritage.

Few Photographs taken in the 1920s
had the subject smiling. Grandpa was
no exception.

                As long as I can remember, daily dental care has been of utmost importance in Mother’s life. I have been so imprinted with her routine. Last year, as we returned at 1:30 a.m. from a late-night ER visit, with the assistance of my brother-in-law and sister, we got our drowsy mother into bed. I exclaimed in a guarded voice, “But she has not brushed and flossed her teeth!” My brother-in-law replied, “Don’t worry about it tonight.”

                For over forty years, Mother faithfully had her dental exams twice a year with Dr. Henderson. She had a good relationship with her dentist whom Dad referred to as Doc. Dr. Gary Henderson and Dad shared interests in cattle raising, flying, and World War II history. Dad looked forward to the dental checks for the visiting they would do.

                With thanks to the Lord for giving her a good set of teeth, Mother’s stringent daily care, and the assistance of a dedicated dentist, Mother still retains her own teeth.

                Often, as she brushes and flosses each night, I remind her health is directly tied to having a good set of teeth so she can eat anything she wants. Other times, we laugh when I remind her of little sign in one of Dr. Henderson’s exam rooms. It stated, “Only floss the teeth you want to keep.”

                Her DNA, her daily dental care, and a dedicated dentist have contributed to her beautiful smile. The most important contributor I have saved for last. A smile originates internally in one’s spirit fueled primarily by one’s attitude.

                Solomon writes in Proverbs 15:13, A glad heart makes a cheerful face, but by sorrow of heart the spirit is crushed.(ESV) The wisest man who ever lived, Solomon gives insight into retaining “a glad heart” in Proverbs 12:25 with these words, Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad.(ESV)

                Anxiety as scripture says, “weighs…” one “down.” Encouraging words from loved ones and friends lift the heavy heart, but nothing can replace the strengthening received from reading God’s Word. Our pastor taught on the life and impact of Ezra and said many attributed Psalm 119 to Ezra’s authorship. In the last phrase of Psalm 119:28, God inspired these words, … strengthen me according to Your word! (ESV) 

                        May we all be challenged to give a smile to all we meet. It costs nothing. Investing in smiling can yield great dividends to yourself and anyone with whom you share the smile. The oldest Big Bend resident would recommend and encourage smiling. It has served her well these 99 years.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Undeserved Grace

This week once again, I have been reminded of the graciousness of God through His loved ones. Over and over, Mother and I have been the recipients of the kindness of others who give time, resources, prayers, and encouragement in the name of the Lord without show or fanfare. To each of you – Thank you!
        Over the last few weeks, I have been observing the beautiful, vibrant purple flowers of vetch this spring. Seeing these gorgeous verdant creations of God brought to mind the words of Jesus in Luke 12:27, Consider how the wildflowers: They don’t labor or spin thread. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was adorned like one of these! (HCSB). Those stunning vetch blooms in the pastures, meadow, and even in the yard had done nothing to deserve such visual exaltation – no work, no self effort.

        Jesus continued in Luke 12:28 comparing we humans to the short-lived wildflowers. Then He asked the rhetorical question at the end of the verse, …How much more will He do for you – you of little faith? (HCSB).
        Then Jesus issued a command that if heeded would be life-altering to His disciples. In verse 29 of the same chapter of Luke His words appear, Don’t keep striving for what you should eat and what you should drink, and don’t be anxious. Our Lord and Master addressed the basic needs of mankind but gave a terse command in His last three words – Don’t be anxious. In our country, so often our anxiety is fueled by worries over issues never concerning the gravely deprived populations of the third world countries whose primary need is their next meal or shelter for their family.
        Over the last 12 years since returning to the farm, it seems almost daily anxiety enters my mind. Prayers of thanksgiving all through the day have helped refocus me. Every time our needs are met, even though God primarily uses people to meet them, He is the source of every good and perfect gift.
        Frequently, I am reminded how undeserving I am of each need being met. Yet our loving Heavenly Father lavishes on us what we need. That is the beauty of grace, giving us something we in no way deserve.
        This week may we walk in the daily awareness of the truth of Paul’s words in Ephesians 1:7-8. May our meditation on God's undeserved grace energize our lives to obey the promptings of the Holy Spirit as we go through the week. 

It is through the Son, at the cost of His own blood, that we are redeemed, freely forgiven through that full and generous grace which has overflowed into our lives and opened our eyes to the truth. (I used a translation that Grandpa Calvin Callcayah Smith loved to read -  J.B. Phillips Translation.)