Learning to Carry On

For this week's blog posting, I am opening with my father's words about the uniqueness of the birthdays of his father, his brother just two years younger than him, and my dad. This week will mark these three birthdays and one tragic death. I concluded this week's post with a piece entitled Learning to Carry On and published along with other tributes to Oklahoma fathers in the June 2009 issue of Oklahoma Living feature entitled Fathers: A Tribute.

Papa’s birthday was June 16^th.  I was born on June 15 in 1919, so Papa named me after himself.  Two years later another boy was born exactly on Papa’s birthday.  Frederick was born on June 16, 1921.  The three of us always celebrated our birthdays together on June 16. By Edmund Gates, Jr. as told to Bernadean Gates   

Gates children just a couple of years before the 
Great Depression struck - Mary, Ella, Frederick,
Edmund, Jr., with Martha in front of him, & Jess,  

The day following Dad’s 16^th birthday, my father’s brother, Frederick, was struck and killed by lightning. Who would ever imagine this 14-year-old lovingly called “Freddie” by his family would be killed instantly on his birthday? Dad learned to deal with loss, to grieve, and “pick up the pieces and go on.”

Dad enlisted in the Army Air Corps eight days after the bombing of Pearl Harbor. He flew 25 missions over Europe as an upper turret gunner on a B-17 Flying Fortress. After completing his combat duty and being awarded the Distinguished Flying Cross, his crew was shot down over Berlin, killing some of his closest buddies. Instead of allowing the devastation of war to destroy him, Dad used it as motivation to become the best carpenter, husband, and father that he could be. He viewed his survival of the war as an incredible gift and his experiences as precious memories with valuable lessons.

Sometimes when I become weary of the stresses and responsibilities in life, I recall the life-altering situations that Dad experienced and how he thrived in spite of them. That very thought spurs me to a life of faith, courage, and resolve to live a life worthy of being called his daughter.

As I concluded meshing these two writings together, I thought of the powerful result of living out Paul's writing as read in Romans 5:3-5. How God uses this progressive sequence to lead us to do hard things.

...We also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

To view a cherished photo of one of the last birthdays of Grandpa Edmund Gates, Sr. access at the link below:
https://bernadeanjgates.blogspot.com/2015/06/singing-on-grandpas-birthday.html

Musings on Memorial Day Morning

    Just last week when working in the yard, I thought to myself, Oh, look at the vintage rose bush! I wonder if it truly survived the drought. Near the bottom of the bush, there were a couple of the tiniest pinkish buds trying to emerge.

    On Memorial Day morning of 2023, I rejoiced at the glorious morning following the much-appreciated half inch of predawn rain. What a surprise to glance at the corner of the yard fence and see the vintage rose bush reveling in all its glory in the pristine, rain-cleansed early morning!

Grandma Gladys Rainey Smith's
Vintage Rose Bush in 2023

    My mind rolled back to Memorial Days beginning in the mid-60s. Early each Memorial Day morning, Dad would take a couple of large tubs in the back of his pickup and drive northeast in the pasture. Grandma Gladys Smith explained Felix Deputy had planted roses near a small house where he lived in what is now Mother’s northeast pasture. Mr. Deputy identified himself as a servant or laborer on early 20th century United States Census records for the Big Hill Township, the area that includes the Big Bend.

    The tiny, light pink roses were cut from the hidden former residence noted only by the roses and a foundation. Dad cut them with his knife, put them in the big tubs, and added water. At the cemetery, Dad delighted in having an inquisitive young relative peer into the tubs. Dad allowed that child to help by pouring water around the small bouquet of flowers placed into the little hole Dad had dug. Dad usually shared a brief biography of the deceased.

    Sometimes the vintage rose bush I had recently observed provided a few extra roses for those Memorial Day flower tubs. It is hard to believe the longevity of the vintage rose bush in the southwest corner of Mother’s lawn. Year after year the beauty of the little rose clusters have graced the yard of Mother’s pink house. Some of the tiny posies are so small yet so exquisitely captivating.

The Beautiful Clusters of Roses in 2023

    I thought of how much the lives of the godly mirror the vintage rose bush. Isaiah recorded in Isaiah 46:4 these words that state God provides sustaining support for His people as they age. “Even to your old age, I am He, and even to the gray hairs I will carry you! I have made and I will bear; Even I will carry, and will deliver you.

    As I looked at the attractive little bunches of the pink roses, I recalled the Apostle Peter writing specifically to women these words from Peter’s first letter, chapter 3, verse 4, “You should be known for the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.” Every believer’s heart cry should reflect the words of the old song, "Let the beauty of Jesus be seen in me."

One of the Tiniest Pink Roses

    Some of the most delicate, exquisite, yet vibrant colored roses on the vintage bush were gorgeous in color but miniscule in size. The unnamed author inspired by the Holy Spirit wrote the longest chapter in the Bible, Psalm 119, based entirely on the Word of God. Verse 141 appears in New International Reader’s Version of the Bible like this, “I’m not important. People look down on me. But I don’t forget to obey your rules.” Just as the tiniest roses might have been overlooked on the bush so may many believers appear insignificant. However, we will never be unimportant in God’s eyes when we know and obey the commands of God. In turn, we will impact and influence those around us. 

    May the roses that come and go so quickly yet bring such lovely sights for the eyes and fragrance for the nose enable us to embrace and pray these phrases from the prayer of Moses as recorded in Psalm 90:12 and 17.

So teach us to number our days that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

...Let the beauty of the Lord our God be upon us and establish the work of our hands for us; Yes, establish the work of our hands.

The Eight-Hour Flight with Screaming Little Girls

Charlotte and Hubert Hutchens

          Charlotte Hutchens, our dear neighbor, celebrates her 90th birthday today. She has shared many stories over the years, but this one is possibly my favorite one. I think this story honors the type of friend and neighbor Charlotte has been to our family. Happy 90th Birthday, Charlotte!

            An eight-hour flight with two little girls - aged five and seven screaming at the top of their lungs! What a boarding line to be in! thought Charlotte. As they inched closer, they could hear the two little high-pitched voices shrieking, "I don't want to fly on an airplane!" Charlotte was almost ready to join with them. Who would want to fly a third of a day on this plane?

            Charlotte and Hube, her husband, were flying to visit their daughter and family in Alaska, but the auditory torture caused Charlotte to seriously consider refusing to board that flight. She contemplated choosing to delay their arrival to visit their daughter. She even commented to her husband, “I can’t take that for eight hours!”

            Instantly, other passengers crowded behind her and Hubert making her escape impossible. Instead of acting on her deep-seated desire to bolt, she continued settling in for the lengthy flight. She and her husband were not seated together. To her horror, she was assigned the seat between the “screaming sisters.”

            Upon comprehension of her reality, she breathed a prayer, “Lord, you’ve got to help me get through this.” Immediately, a calm, fear-numbing peace enveloped her entire being.

            She spoke to both saying, “Now we’ve got to stop this.” She reaffirmed in a calming, quiet voice that she enjoyed flying and agreed to hold a hand of each frightened child. Charlotte began to extol the delights of flying. As the plane took off, with their free hand, the two frightened little ones lifted the pillow they each clutched to covered their eyes.

            Charlotte mentally searched the dark recesses of her memory for a soothing lullaby.  She could only recall a song I had given her from the curriculum I had used as a part of the International School Project curriculum in 1995. She began singing the lilting, catchy tune with the words:

The Spirit of God

Is my Helper and Guide

Giving me power

To do what is right.

Spirit of God, Spirit of God,

Spirit of God, Spirit of God.

He gives love,

He gives joy,

He gives peace,

He gives

Patience to both young and old.

Kindness and goodness,

And faithfulness, gentleness,

He even gives self-control.

            The girls quieted and nestled close to Charlotte. Soon the flight attendant spoke in hushed tones to Charlotte, “Ma’am, is there anything I can get you – champagne, anything?”

            Charlotte, knowing she was experiencing a divine empowerment in her own being that had led to an intervention by the Prince of Peace in the lives of these little distraught girls, responded, “No, I am doing fine.”

            The smallest one of the girls seated herself on Charlotte’s lap after takeoff, retaining the pillow over her eyes. Charlotte had ceased singing momentarily. Tiny, bright eyes peeked from the side of the pillow and said, “Keep singing.”

            They wanted their grandma. Charlotte reassured them she was a grandma with grandchildren much like them. To her sorrow, she learned their mother had died. Following her death, the two scared siblings had flown to live with their grandmother whom they apparently adored. Recently, the two had been informed their father had remarried. Now they were flying to meet a woman for the first time – a woman whom they were expected to call “Mother.” No wonder they were screaming – it wasn’t flying they didn’t want to do. They didn’t want to land. Who could blame them?

            Everyone on the flight from the mainland to the 49^th state realized something had transpired on the flight that had seemed doomed to be “torturous” to all except the profoundly deaf. The woman seated next to Hubert commented, “That woman up there must be a saint!”

            I can envision the twinkle in his eye as Hube responded to her complimentary statement, “That’s my wife.” Nobody had to tell him what a remarkable young woman he had taken as a bride many years earlier. (One of my favorite photos of Hube and his "bride" as he still refers to her.)

            As the flight neared its end, the flight attendant returned. Charlotte had sung the simple, but profound song many times during the eight hours while sitting between the two little girls who needed the grandma from Oklahoma more than she could ever imagine.

            Once again, the hushed voice of the flight attendant leaned over to speak with Charlotte. She intimated, “We had 17 children flying unattended on this flight, and every one of them was listening to you.”

            Only eternity will reveal how many people were impacted by Charlotte’s willingness to rely on the Lord instead of running off the plane, like she wanted to do. Even though many years have passed since that flight, Charlotte continues to reflect on one of the greatest divine interventions when the Lord used her as a catalyst in accomplishing His heavenly purpose.

            Jesus spoke these words that transformed that plane flight those years ago as recorded by the Apostle John in John 14:27: Peace I leave with you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. Only a relationship with Jesus, prophetically called the Prince of Peace, endows a person with His Spirit, the Holy Spirit, that enveloped that plane and can bring peace and direction to our daily lives.

To listen to children singing "Spirit of God" click on this link to Douglas Eltzroth's composition: https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=61qsqZ5umKE