Nine Decades Plus Seven Years

Bernyce Smith Gates, my mother, is  97  years old today, October 17. I am reprising an earlier blog post with an updated ending.

Bernyce Smith Gates in 2021

Mother as a teen

1^st Decade 1924-1933 The first time I remember meeting Travis Myers, he related this account to me. Travis, who was about five years older than Bernyce Smith Gates, my mother, said when he was around 12 years old, he accidentally knocked her down on the way home from Belford School. He told me that as he towered over her, my mother, a spunky, small , seven-year-old, “got him told” about how he should have been paying attention to what he was doing and then would not have run over a little kid. Mother vaguely remembers this happening.

2^nd Decade 1933-1943 Mother graduated at the top of her class in eighth grade in 1939 from Belford Grade School and had the highest grade average as a senior at Burbank High School in 1943. 

3^rd Decade 1944-1953 Mother worked in a temporary capacity at the First National Bank in Burbank, Oklahoma. She was filling in for the bank president’s wife while she went to be with their daughter who was having a baby. Shortly after that, Mother was offered a permanent position at the bank, but instead chose to marry Edmund Gates, Jr. on March 4, 1948.

The First National Bank building in Burbank, Oklahoma. At the time of this  photograph, the building was a residence.

The First National Bank building in Burbank, Oklahoma. At the time of this 
photograph, the building was a residence.

4^th Decade 1954-1963 Mother gave birth to both my sister, Angie and me and became the epitome of a fulltime, dedicated wife and mother. The myriad of Mother’s tasks ranged from designing and sewing a winter queen costume when Angie sang the lead role in a school Christmas program, encouraging daily piano practice to daily preparing (always before the sun came up which didn’t jive with her personal sleep pattern) a lunch for my father to take on the job with him. She insured he always had a hot dish, as well as chilled fruit or ice cream, and something to satisfy his sweet tooth in his lunch box. Mother’s average day began around 5 a.m. and ended well after midnight.

Angie during her final fitting models the
Winter Queen costume created by Mother .
 This was for the Christmas program
at the Ralston Elementary School.

5^th Decade 1964-1973 My sister’s “family” booklet that she compiled in second grade began the section about her mother with this sentence, “My mother works.” Mother never worked a day outside the home during our upbringing. However, she canned 52 quarts of green beans yearly, preserved all other vegetables my grandparents and my dad raised in the garden. She made butter from the milk given by the family milk cow. It was the task of Angie and me to turn the handle of the Daisy churn until the butter “came.” She prepared three balanced meals each day for my grandparents, my father, my sister, and me.

6^th Decade 1974-1983 For several years, Mother lovingly cared for both her parents until her father’s death in October, 1982, and the death of her mother in May of 1983.

7^th Decade 1984-1993 When my grandparents died, Mother decided this was a time in her life to do what she most wanted to do so she embarked on intensive Bible study to prepare each week for teaching the adult women’s class at Ralston Baptist Church.

8^th Decade 1994 – 2003 One of Mother’s great accomplishments was losing a total of 80 pounds over several years. She has retained a healthy weight up to the present.

9^th Decade 2004 – 2013 In August of 2011, Mother recovered from gall bladder surgery in a remarkably, short time. She experienced a blockage requiring an ultrasound that detected an unrelated mass in December of 2011. A malignancy was discovered in January of 2012. In February of 2012, her oncologist reassured our family that surgery would be the answer for the tumor because it was identified so early. The successful surgery was on March 20, 2012, and yet miraculously, she was ready for Dad to come home from rehabilitation a week later. We still give thanks for that painful blockage.

Mother  in her early
 9th decade

On March 4, 2012, Mother and Dad shared their 64^th anniversary dinner in his hospital room. One of his nurses, in her 20s, commented about what the secret was to the longevity of their marriage. Mother responded, “Well we are both Christians and have tried to put the Lord first in our relationship and Edmund has been easy to get along with.” Most of those who know her agree she is quite a remarkable woman herself.

10^th Decade 2014-2021 With Dad’s second stroke, Mother learned dietician skills as she calculated the number of grams of protein in the protein-rich prepared meals. For about 19 months, she continued faithfully fixing nutritious meals until his death. For the last six years, she has retained her cattle herd, made efforts to do upgrades on the farm, voraciously studied God’s word, and prayed for scores of people often in the wee hours of the morning. What a good example for those who love her!

Happy 97^th Birthday, Mother!