Parallel Friendships - Two Aunts and Their Nieces

 Parallel Friendships

Mary Elizabeth Gates Roberts - My Mother
recalled Mary's generosity to allow my father
to repeatedly use her new car when he was
dating her. Mary's car easily outclassed the
older pickup truck that he had.

                November 17 marks the 106^th birthday of Mary Elizabeth Gates Roberts. Aunt Mary was the second daughter born to my paternal grandparents. She was three years older than my father, Edmund Gates, Jr. She completed grade school at Woodland, the country school in the Big Bend community. Many girls, especially living in a rural area in that era, concluded their formal schooling; however, my grandfather, a strong proponent of education, brokered a deal with A. C. Hightower for Mary to live with his family in Fairfax, Oklahoma, and attend high school at Fairfax High School. The men agreed upon an amount for her room and board with her assisting Mrs. Hightower with household chores.

Mary in the car that
she couldn't back up!

                Mary formed a friendship with the Hightowers’ older daughter, Margaret Jane, known to her family and friends as “Janie.” Janie’s outgoing personality meshed with Mary who was quiet and reserved. Mary graduated from FHS in 1934 with Janie receiving her diploma in 1935.

                The two friends went their separate ways with Mary training as a beautician and working in that profession until her marriage to Marion Roberts in 1942. My father told of Mary driving from Arizona where her husband was based in World War II without being able to drive in reverse! He recorded this account in the retelling of his experiences as a B-17 crewman in the book, Okie Over Europe published by his nephew and namesake, Daniel Edmund Newland.

                Janie attended Hills Business College and then was employed in various positions in Fairfax, including working for her father in his grocery store. She moved to Washington, D.C. and worked for the F.B.I. in its identification department from 1941 until 1946. She married Albert Phillippe in 1946.

Margaret Jane Hightower Phillippe

                Aunt Mary and her husband lived abroad in many countries, including the Philippines and Tripoli, Libya, because of his career in the United States Air Force. Janie never lived outside the United States, but she and her husband traveled extensively in Europe, Asia, and South America.

Both Mary and Janie loved music. Mary enjoyed playing the organ in her home, often accompanied by her husband on his harmonica. Janie continued taking piano lessons well into her seventies.

The similarity in these two friends continued in their love of painting. Mary’s granddaughters have cherished paintings, representative of their grandmother’s talent and artistic ability. Janie’s art classes and painting with her friends remained a high priority even as she advanced in years.

                Janie’s niece, Debbie Sue Hightower Ballinger, and I don’t remember not knowing each other. We began a strong friendship in first grade that lasted into high school. Even though we parted ways for our collegiate careers, we "had a blast" living next door to each other in West Bennett Hall for one semester at Oklahoma State University.

Debbie asked me to be her maid of honor at her wedding to Christopher Ballinger in 1980. Our friendship remains stronger than ever. We share prayer requests and keep in touch even though we live in two different states.

Debbie and I on her wedding day.

Debbie and I during one of those hilarious
study sessions.

                My dad would often say when Debbie came to “study” at my house during our high school years, “You girls are sure having a lot of fun. You laugh all the time.” We did and we still do. Almost any time we get to visit, we have several moments when we share hearty laughter together. 

         The scripture says, “A merry heart does good like a medicine.” Countless studies and articles promote this same line of thought. Hopefully, each reader has an enduring friendship like Aunt Mary and Janie Hightower Phillippe and one full of laughter as Debbie and I do.