Sunday, August 1, 2021

Remembering Steve Gates on His 70th Birthday

This week would have marked the 70th birthday of Steven Glenn Gates on August 3. Steve was larger than life in his living and his love for his family. That twinkle in his eye, as well as his million-dollar grin, and booming voice were classic Steve Gates qualities. Anyone who knew him very well was quite aware that the first time he met Barbara Jean Clark she had his heart lock, stock and barrel. Prior to Steve’s death, Barbara and I collaborated on the article below. It was originally published in Mature Living in March of 2010.

School  Photo of Steve taken
during his days at Liberty 
Elementary School in Ponca 
City, Okalahoma. from the
collection of Bernyce Gates.

THE HEARING AID WITH A TOOTH MARK

By Barbara Clark Gates as told to Bernadean Gates

We had endured some trying years. My husband, Steve, was diagnosed with a brain tumor in the fall of 2003. He had recuperated rapidly and responded to the therapy, for which we gave God the glory.

Then, in February 2004, our oldest son, Clark, was killed in a car wreck. God sustained us during that crushing time through the prayers of our church family and friends. Steve and I were especially strengthened by people who had also experienced the death of a child. These parents empathized with our grief-stricken state and understood the dark path we were suddenly treading.

Steve and Clark while the family lived in 
Missouri. from the photograph collection of 
Benyce Gates..

In 2007, during a routine check-up, we learned that Steve’s tumor was aggressively growing, and surgery was strongly recommended. We faced the same medical progression of just a few years earlier. This time the surgery was followed by six weeks of radiation and chemotherapy treatments. Every day after work, we made the 90-minute drive into Tulsa, Oklahoma, for Steve’s treatments.

One of the most annoying side effects was the deterioration in Steve’s hearing. Steve had worn a hearing aid for many years, but now, even with his device, he could not hear his grandchildren or engage in meaningful conversation. How stifling this was for my gregarious husband who loved nothing better than a lively conversation! I arranged for Steve to be evaluated to find some type of hearing aid to assist his debilitated hearing. I was elated to discover the clinic had a loaner Steve could try before we spent nearly $3,000 for the new aid.

One day I arrived home from work to learn Steve had lost the loaner hearing aid while working in the pasture. Isn’t this the proverbial needle in a haystack? I mused to myself. Inwardly, I bemoaned the cost of replacing the lost loaner as well as paying for the new one we ordered. I went to God in prayer, seeking His miraculous intervention in a seemingly, hopeless situation.

The following Sunday, our daughter, Joni, and her two daughters pulled into our driveway after attending church. As she approached our rural home, she heard an unusual sound. She questioned me about the source of that strange noise, saying optimistically. “It could be Dad’s hearing aid.”

I replied that it was probably a locust. I was unwilling to allow any hope of locating the hearing aid to be raised, only to be dashed by the stark reality of the unlikelihood of finding something so small in our spacious yard. After all, why would it be out on the lawn when Steve had lost it in the pasture? I thought. Haven’t we diligently combed over the property already?

Nevertheless, I stopped to listen and immediately recognized the unmistakable sound I had heard so often – the squeal of a hearing aid turned to a high volume.

Joni and I began a humorous version of “Marco Polo” in a collaborative effort to locate what we could only dare to hope was the lost hearing aid. To our astonishment, there in the front yard, almost in one of my flower beds, was the loaner hearing aid with very little damage other than a dog’s tooth mark. What were the chances that our black Labrador retriever would turn on the hearing aid and carry it from the pasture to our front yard so it could be easily heard and found?

Joni turned to my 3-year-old granddaughter and said, “Tell Nana about your lesson in children’s church.”

Pretty, little Mattie glibly piped up, gazing into my eyes, “Nana, pray, pray, pray!”

I gave God all the glory for miraculously using our gentle family dog to solve a demoralizing problem in our already stressed lives.

God challenges His people in Philippians 4:6-8 “Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.”

Often if families are attentive and open, God instructs several generations in His ways just as He did that Sunday for Joni, Mattie, and me. Those God-engineered experiences provide faith-building moments that endure throughout family members’ lives, reaping eternal rewards.

Barbara Clark Gates Clovis, Mattie Jean Murphy, and Joni Jean Gates Murphy
standing on the exact spot where the hearing aid was found. Mattie is now a
17-year-old senior who remains active in the church youth group. Joni serves in
our church, specifically leading the craft department each of the five nights of VBS
this summer. Barbara and Rick, who she married in 2016, lead the large youth 
group of our small rural church. (from the photo collection of Barbara Clovis)

 

Sunday, July 25, 2021

Cody and the Short Tank...

 ...and Perseverance

Cody Hightower, a lifelong Bender, monitors several natural gas and oil wells in our community. He checks wells regularly to ensure they are operating properly without leaking. If he finds anything malfunctioning or broken, Cody must fix it.

                One responsibility of his job intrigues me. Cody hauls salt water from the wells. In the short tank, Cody transports the salt water to a disposal well. The short tank is never driven fast. The engine roars as it pulls the short tank slowly up inclined roads in our community. Cody’s perseverance impresses me.

                Some time ago, Cody introduced me to his boss when we sat near each other at a funeral. His boss appreciated an employee dedicated to keeping the wells working as well as possible.

Interestingly, after an unseasonably cold snap one winter, I asked Cody how he was weathering the bitter cold. He grinned and said, “I’ve done better than the equipment has.”

                Seeing perseverance in the 21st century seems rarer than in other eras. Yet we know perseverance is required in completing training for a career whether an electrician journeyman, a cosmetology student finishing the coursework and getting licensure, or acquiring any new job skill.

                Every relationship requires a resolution—to make a marriage work, to insure parent/teen communication, or first-time parents “gritting out” care of a sick baby. So many tasks in our homes demand a commitment to stick-to-itiveness.

                Many hobbies demand perseverance. Furniture refinishing, vehicle restoration, renovating a room or home, mastering an instrument, hunting, fishing, or almost any avocation demands tenacity to achieve the desired result.

                The principle of perseverance runs throughout the scripture, but is especially presented by James, the half-brother of Jesus. James, one of the early leaders of the Jerusalem church, writes to expatriates from the Jerusalem church. These families had scattered over the Roman Empire due to persecution, much instigated by Saul (who had his name changed to “Paul” after his encounter with Jesus) when Saul’s intention remained to destroy the followers of Jesus.

                James admonished in the first chapter, verses 2-4: Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

                The use of the word “perseverance” indicates the godly approach to trials, adversity, difficulty, and testing. The writer of Hebrews bears this out in chapter 10, verse 36: You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised.

                We embrace the Lord, knowing He will empower us to persevere. Again, turning to the book of James, we read in chapter 1, verse 12, Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love Him.

                We see James mentions God promises those who love Him will receive the realization of the promises He swore to them. Jesus admonished, “If you love Me, you will keep my commandments.”

                May we remember Cody’s perseverance with his short tank and let his example spur us to persevere in whatever task God gives us or any path that He calls us to walk.

On July 24, Cody graduated
from C.L.E.E.T. training and met the 
requirements for becoming an Osage
County Reserve Deputy. We are
thankful to have a representative of our
  Osage County Sheriff’s Department
living in our community.
Congratulations, Cody!

.


Sunday, July 18, 2021

Lou Gates and Ann Goad - Lifelong Friends

 This week we held Vacation Bible School at our church in Ralston. My aunt, Lou Gates, celebrated her birthday this week, too. Even though she no longer works in VBS, her commitment to VBS was strong in the past. She invited her grandchildren to stay with her all week long, transported them to the church each day, and helped serve the much sought-after cookies and Kool-Aide to each student and worker at the VBS. She so desired for her grandchildren to hear about Jesus and receive Him as their Savior. Ann Goad, her dear friend, also worked faithfully in VBS at the Big Bend Baptist Church and the Ralston Bible Church.* May their dedication to ensure children know who Jesus is and learn to love Him serve as inspiration to all of us. Happy Birthday to You, Aunt Lou!

 I have heard the statistic of the rarity of a person who has five lifelong friends. One of the finest examples of genuine friendship was eloquently described in a poem penned by Lou Dixon Gates, my paternal aunt. She doesn’t share her poetry readily. Her poem captures the strong friendship she shared with Ann Christensen Goad.

                She and Ann Christensen Goad met at Burbank High School in 1950. They shared a love of playing basketball and soon found they had other interests in common.

                As the poem depicts, these two kindred spirits shared a common bond that held them together through marriages, bearing four children each, reaching their career goals, and supporting each other amidst sorrow and illness.

                The two “girls” involved their husbands in their friendship as her poem bears out. The four enjoyed attending many sporting events together. They took in the yearly farm show, making it a two-day adventure.

                I recall Uncle Jim Gates regretting that he didn’t go visit Forrest “Frosty” Goad, Ann’s husband, for the last time. Uncle Jim had innumerable rounds of treatments to combat the Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma that invaded his body. I remember sharing with him a scripture verse that had encouraged me when the constraints of life prevented me from doing all I would like to do for a person or in a situation. Jesus spoke of Mary of Bethany, responding to criticism of her anointing him with costly perfume, with these words recorded in Mark 14: 8, “She has done what she could.” Jesus went on to explain that her action would be an ongoing memorial of her love for Him. A true friend understands our limitations and loves us, truly valuing any expressions of genuine friendship, no explanations or apologies needed, 

                The writer of Proverbs inspired by the spirit of God wrote in Proverbs 17:17, “A friend loves at all times.” My aunt’s poem illustrates this Biblical principle. She and Ann lived out this verse throughout their lives. 

Lou Dixon Gates who would readily
show you her keepsake book with 
names of  her grandchildren and the
date each received Jesus as their
Savior. Some of the names are
written in their own handwriting!
         
Friends

by Lou Gates

Two Girls

One country girl

Outside chores and walked a lot

One city girl

Inside jobs and walked a little

    School together       

Science, Miss Mantooth

History, Mrs. Brandenburg

English, Mrs. Norman

Typing, Gussie

Drivers Ed, Mr. Stegall

Change gears going up school hill

Basketball

Mr. Stegall

Wasn’t as old as we thought

Bus rides

Girls to the front, boys to the back

Teamwork, signals, plays

Noon hour

Joe Hedge drug

Coke in a bottle

Spearmint gum a nickel pkg

Sat nights

Fairfax a must

One dollar paid for

Hamburger, Malt, Movie and Dance

Boys

Dated several

Picked two,

Wouldn’t you know they were both coon hunters

Each of the four

Accepted Christ as Savior

The city girl moved to the country

Walked a lot

The country girl moved to the city

Walked little

Busy life four children each

Church

School

Ballgames

Home

As promised

Thru thick and thin

Grace, Mercy and Peace

FRIENDS

*To read more about Ann's VBS teaching, go to https://bernadeanjgates.blogspot.com/2015/02/remembering-tomasine-leigh-rainey-anson.html . 

Ann Goad had four great grandsons attend VBS this week. Vonda Smith Goad, her daughter -in-law, helped serve refreshments at VBS with two granddaughters -in-law, Bailey Hime Goad and Tiffany Atkins Goad taught classes in VBS 2021. 

To see a photo of Ann, go to https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/102355230/barbara-ann-goad