Turning 90
in the Bend
Mother
and I attended a surprise birthday party for Hubert Hutchens this past week.
Hubert, one of my father’s closest friends, celebrated his 90th
birthday on June 26.
My
dad, Edmund Gates, Jr. and Hubert shared some things in common. They were both
from large families. Dad had eleven siblings and Hubert had seven. They both
chose and married strong women who were only children in their families. Hube
and Dad served in the military. Both of their careers of choice, with Dad as a
carpenter and Hubert as a welder, demanded battling the weather and required use
of their physical strength and problem-solving skills on a daily basis. Once
Hubert and Charlotte, his wife, settled in the Big Bend upon relocating from
Alaska, Dad and Hube shared their love of cattle production and readily helped
each other.
As
we celebrated Hubert’s milestone of nine decades, I asked Charlotte about one
of my father’s favorite stories about her marriage to Hubert. Dad always used
the word “eloped” which aptly described it. Hubert and Charlotte met in Hominy
when she was barely 15 years old. Their dates were always chaperoned by Hube’s older
brother, Lloyd.
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One of my favorite photos of Charlotte and
Hubert from the early days of their relationship
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Hube’s
military induction and a family move by Charlotte’s family interrupted the
budding romance. They met up in Charlotte’s new home in the state of California. During their
reunion, Charlotte recalled vividly the two of them kneeling at the altar of an empty California church. In her heart, Charlotte pinpointed that moment as the day
she committed to love and live with Hubert until death parted them. They made
long-range plans for their marriage to take place a few months later. But her
mother couldn’t approve of her only daughter, at age 15, marrying a 20-year-old
soldier.
Savvy,
determined 15-year-old Charlotte boarded a bus heading east to Colorado right
into a snowstorm. Finally, she arrived, knowing everything would be fine now
that she was with her beloved soldier. As they applied for their marriage
license, worldly-wise Charlotte knew that she was under the required age of 16,
with no parental permission. When the clerk asked her age, Charlotte looked
directly into her eyes and replied assertive “16.”
The
clerk turned to Hubert, addressing him with the same question. Hubert honestly
responded, “20.” To his surprise, he was queried, “Do you have your father’s
permission to marry?”
In
Colorado, at that time, a young man had to be of age 21, to marry, unless he
had written parental consent. With Hubert’s brother and sister-in-law
engineering a solution, they drove to the next county. First, Hubert aged by
one year during the trip. His brother called ahead, preparing the way for
Hubert and Charlotte by saying, “They can’t spend the night together
unmarried.” He was told "get them to the courthouse by 5:30 p.m. and they can be married."
Upon
arriving at the destination, they obtained the marriage license but had to
interrupt a poker game so the justice of the peace could perform the ceremony. Ceremony did not accurately describe the
event. The poker-playing justice looked at Hubert asking, “Do you take her as
your wife?” Immediately, he turned to Charlotte, and asked “Do you take him as
your husband?” Promptly, he pronounced them married.
Fifteen-year-old
Charlotte, with a voice full of disappointment, blurted out, “What about the
ring?”
“Oh!
If I knew you had a ring, I’d have made a bigger deal of it!” the justice of the
peace responded, as he made tracks to get back to his poker game.
Yet
in 2018, Hubert and Charlotte marked 69 years of marriage. Once again, their
wedding story is a tangible reminder that marriage is a lifelong commitment,
not a fancy wedding that looks stunning on social media, but a promise to each other until death separates.
Hubert
has walked the road of grief following the death of his twin brother, Herb. He
and Charlotte mourned the illness and death of their son, John. Yet amidst his own
health challenges, Hubert retains a positive outlook on life, focusing on
others, and staying active by doing things for others.
Just
a week before his birthday, Hubert appeared at our door with some of his garden
produce - zucchini and onions for Ben, my brother-in-law. I mentioned what a
milestone his upcoming birthday was. He didn’t respond, “I’ve been really
lucky” or “I’m still kicking.” Instead, Hubert replied, with a voice full of gratitude, “God has been gracious
to me.”
Oh.
that we can all live with that attitude whether age 20 or age 100! I am reminded of the Psalmist’s poetic worship song in Psalm 63:3-4:
Because Your lovingkindness is better than life,
My lips shall
praise You.
Thus I will bless You while I live;
I will lift up my hands in Your name.
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Hubert and Charlotte Hutchens after Hubert was the honored veteran recipient
of a Quilt of Valor on April 8, 2018.
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https://bernadeanjgates.blogspot.com/2017/06/happy-birthday-to-oldest-man-in-big-bend.html
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