She Moved with Grace and Elegance

On Friday, March 8, my cousin notified us of his mother's passing. In December of 2014, I had written a blog posting about Aunt Martha. It was entitled "The Missing Photograph from the Panel." I am posting an edited version to honor her this week.

Florence Martha Gates Johnston was born on December 12, 1925, at her family's home in the Big Bend community west of Ralston, Oklahoma. My father, Edmund Gates, Jr. always said his older sister, Ella, who was almost 11 years old, was allowed to name his new baby sister. She named her Martha for one of her dearest school chums, a girl named Martha Frasier who also attended Woodland School.

Mart, which was the name Dad frequently used for her, had another older sister, Mary who was 9 years old when Martha was born. Later, she would have two younger sisters. Julia would be born in 1933, and Mamie Marie, as Dad would say, came along in 1938. This placed Martha as the middle sister in the family. Her brother Jess was born two years before her, Herbert was born in 1928, and Jim was born in 1931.

             Dad recounted Martha’s graduation from eighth grade at Woodland School in 1939. The rural school was located in the Big Bend where Lester Anson’s home now sets. The three-room school educated over 100 students yearly in first through eighth grades during the Great Depression Era. (See photo of Martha as a teen at right.)

            The spring rains were in full force in May of 1939, when the day of the climactic celebration of the school term was held. Graduations marked accomplishments of the scholars and called for accolades of praise for them. Today large cheering sections of family “whoop and holler” for their graduate. This was not to be for Martha.

            Every time my father retold the story he would say, “I really felt sorry for Martha since she had on her nice dress.” I have heard left-handed men are more sensitive than right-dominant males. Whether this is truth or an urban legend, I do not know. I do know my father was sensitive, not soft, but quite aware of others’ feelings. Martha’s soggy eighth grade graduation day was no exception.

                Dad took Martha to Woodland School on horseback in the rain from their home. He was the only family member who attended. Creeks were flooded along with bar ditches. Dad always intimated that it was a miserable day for a young lady to graduate. Nevertheless, he was glad to be there to act as her chauffeur and escort. 

Bernie, Martha's older son,
Martha, and Patsy, her only
daughter at the farm of Ed
Gates, Sr. in the 1950s.

             Martha’s sensitivity to her brothers and the need for the family’s crop to get to the cotton gin trumped a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to have her picture taken for her senior class panel. Even though she was a teenager, she had already learned to think of others. Isn’t that what life is about?                

             I updated Aunt Martha periodically on Dad’s condition following his stroke, One day when we visited about six years ago, she explained to me why her photo was not on the 1943 senior panel of Burbank High School. The senior portraits were being taken during the height of cotton-picking season. Martha said her brothers were working in the field to get the cotton out of the field in a timely manner. She said, “I just felt like I should stay home from school and help my brothers.
          Putting others first has always been a challenge to humans. Today it seems technology has isolated people. Sometimes this results in self-absorption and a disregard for those in close proximity and their needs.

Martha moved with such grace and elegance. This photo
illustrates why she was a walking testimonial for Estee
Lauder at age 88. My sister told her she should get free
products from the company because of how great she
looked!

          From volunteering for her three children's activities when they were young and even into their high school years to caring for neighbors and serving in her church, she put others first. She gave and gained much pleasure from one of her final, rewarding tasks - delivering Mobile Meals.

Martha always cared deeply for her family. At least one time during every one of our telephone conversations, she would use a phrase to comment on the preciousness of something one of them had done by saying, “Wasn’t that dear?” I heard that spoken almost every time we visited my grandma, Mamie Irene Tripp Gates.
          Each time we talked, she thanked Mother, Angie, and me for caring for Dad. She reiterated in each visit how she prayed faithfully for us. Many times she would lament she could no longer read very well or attend church, but she mailed her tithe to her church and prayed fervently every night. 
          As I reflected since Aunt Martha’s death on March 8, 2019, a few verses from Jesus’ words of comfort to His closest earthly companions, His disciples, just prior to His crucifixion came to mind. These are select verses from John 14.

Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.  (verse 6)

“A little while longer and the world will see Me no more, but you will see Me. Because I live, you will live also.  (verse 19)

Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.  (verse 27)

Randy Johnston, Martha's younger son, with her
at the Gates Reunion in 2013.

                How important for us to remember that Martha would want us to be reminded that Jesus is the way to heaven and because He lives, we will live also. In this truth, we can rest in His peace and be thankful Martha moved among us with grace and elegance.