My aunt, Lou Dixon Gates, was born 90 years ago this week on July 13. She was welcomed by her sister, Boots, age 5 and her brother, George, almost 2 years old.
Even though Lou was the baby of the family, she didn’t fit the stereotypical description of the last born in a family. She laughingly told me Boots always had more important things to do and argued the case that she just couldn't do chores.
When she
and George were in high school, they lived north of Burbank. George insisted
Lou must help him do the chores. So she walked from school to their home,
helped George with the chores, and walked back for her basketball team’s practice.
Lou wondered to me why an older brother needed a younger sister’s help, yet
as she and George aged, her love for him deepened and his death was a great
loss to her in 2021.
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| Lou, as a newlywed |
It had
rained. Lou did not want any trouble when he dropped her off at their home
north of Burbank. She insisted Jim let her out before he tried to cross the
creek up to their house. Getting a pickup stuck after dark in the muddy creek
would not have made a good first impression. She did not want to risk having to
wake up her dad and make him get out of bed to pull the 1948 pickup out of the
muddy creek. Instead, Lou hopped out of the new black pickup and easily found
the stones so she could successfully cross the creek on foot.
Jim and
Lou remembered Brice and Ralph Dooley serving as the main callers at Jump’s
during the square dancing. How frequently they heard, “Bird Hopped In,
Crow Hopped Out!” They socialized with Ann Christensen, Lou’s best friend, who
dated Forrest “Frosty” Goad, one of Jim’s dear friends from the Big Bend. They
got acquainted with Eva Mae Garner and her date, Bunk Pease. Of course, Jim’s
older brother, Herb, and his girlfriend, Billie Dooley, “ran” with them, too.
Jim and
Lou spent many fun nights at Jump’s Roller Inn. Lou loved to skate on Wednesday
nights. Then they danced on Saturday nights. Lou described them as “fun dance
parties.”
Verna
Lou and Vera Lee Christy had taught Jim to dance at the house dances in the Big
Bend. Vera Lee would later marry Jim’s friend, Ralph Dooley. Lou recalled Jim
teaching her to square dance. Lou taught her brother, George, the two-step.
George was so much taller than Lou that she had to adjust her instruction to
compensate for the height difference!
Through
her love and commitment to the sport of basketball, she met Ann Christensen
Goad at Burbank High School in 1950. They shared a love of playing
basketball and soon found they had other interests in common. They became lifelong
best friends. (On the topic of basketball – Lou has grandchildren who have excelled
on the court with the round ball. Recently, a local Woodland fan told how
enjoyable it is to watch one of Lou’s great-grandsons play.)
Lou composed a poem on friendship that depicts that these two kindred spirits shared
a common bond that held them together through marriages, bearing four children
each, reaching their career goals, and supporting each other amidst sorrow and
illness. Even though Ann died ten years ago, Lou continues to miss that
cherished friendship. Lou’s poem may be accessed at https://bernadeanjgates.blogspot.com/2015/08/lou-gates-on-friendship.html
Lou’s
family moved to Ponca City, she graduated from Ponca City High School and began
working at Continental as a key punch. By December of 1951, Jim had joined the
air force and was stationed at Sheppard Field in Wichita Falls, Texas. They
decided to get married that December. They didn’t have a car, but Jim had
friends.
Alph
Dooley drove Jim to Ponca City to get a blood test. They arrived at the Kay
County Courthouse in Newkirk, Oklahoma. The county clerk’s office was closed
since it was Saturday. Thankfully, Jim had chosen to wear his uniform for his
wedding day. The court clerk happened to be there and glimpsed the profile of
Jim’s military hat outside the door window. She told him she wouldn’t have
opened the door and issued a marriage license except for the patriotic chord
that his hat struck in her heart. The court clerk indicated he needed to be 21
years old to get married. She asked, “Are you 21?” He replied in the
affirmative. After all, he would be 21 in January.
They
were then married by the justice of the peace in Newkirk, on December 22, 1951.
Of course, they needed two witnesses. Alph was one. The justice of the peace
stepped out the door and pulled a man from the street!
Lou wore
a blue dress with navy shoes. Jim, of course, chose to get married in his air
force uniform. They had no flowers. Not even one photograph memorialized the
day. As with many weddings in the mid-20th century, the wedding
itself was a “low-budget” affair.
They did
have wedding rings. Earlier in the year, Jim had been gambling. He won enough
to buy a wedding ring set for Lou from Drake’s in Ponca City. He gave Herb, his
brother, a sizable amount to buy his new wife, Billie, a set of wedding rings,
too. Lou bought a wedding band for $19.95 for Jim – paying for it by
making payments from her paycheck that she earned at Continental.
Following
the wedding, Jim and Lou spent the rest of the weekend in the Bend with Jim’s
brother and his wife, Herb and Billie Dooley Gates. Then Jim returned to
Sheppard Field. Lou remained at her job at Continental and lived with her
parents. That love story and marriage lasted 65 years until Jim’s death.
By April
of 1952, they decided they wanted to be together – no matter how challenging it
might be. With a suitcase of towels and their clothes, they began.
Jim was
stationed at Rapid City, South Dakota. The base was located 12 miles outside of
Rapid City. But alas, there was no base housing.
The two
newlyweds secured a room to rent from a sweet couple, Bill and Evelyn. Their
home was situated about six blocks from downtown. Lou and Jim rented the room
for $35 per month. Since they had no kitchen or even a hot plate, for a while,
they walked the six blocks to a restaurant downtown to eat and then the six
blocks back to their room.
Soon
Bill and Evelyn recognized Jim and Lou as an honest, responsible couple and
gave them “kitchen privileges” for an additional $5 each month. Evelyn did
their laundry and even began ironing their clothes. Soon Evelyn was preparing
meals and inviting this transplanted duo to join them. As Jim recalled,
this kind couple really took Lou and him in and treated them like
family.
For transportation, Jim found another airman stationed at the base and rode with him, furnishing gas money. Lou was employed by Buckingham Trucking as a key punch operator (data entry). She used the Rapid City bus system to commute to work.
One definitive event in January 1954 marked a turning point, impacting the rest of their lives and all of their descendants. They had moved back to the Big Bend after Jim's stint in the air force. Lou recalled living in a little house they rented from Reid Morris. Their older daughter, Claudia, was less than a year old.
Lou said that they knew people from the Big Bend Baptist Church were praying for them. The pastor, Ray T. Hart, and Jess Dittmar came to visit them. The two men took their Bibles and showed Jim and Lou the way of salvation to be assured of a place in heaven. While Bro. Hart talked with Jim, Bro. Dittmar explained to Lou that a person must believe that Jesus is God's Son and came to earth to die for her sins but rose from the dead. He turned to Romans 10:9-10 which says:
If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.
That January day, both Jim and Lou
confessed Jesus as Lord, asking Him to forgive their sins, and committed their
lives to follow Him.
Through the years, Lou and Jim kept their grandchildren for the week of Vacation Bible School so they could attend with Lou when she helped each summer. Lou always had the week so well planned that it appeared to run smoothly with all of them having a good time while learning about Jesus.
Many of their grandchildren and
great grandchildren have had their Falls Creek camp entry fees paid by Jim and
Lou. Much like my grandma, Gladys Rainey Smith, Lou has a book documenting the
salvation of each of their descendants. Lou treasures that as much as any of
the keepsakes in her home.
Lou mused that it was no
happenstance that she and Jim settled in the Big Bend, but it was part of God's
plan for them to hear the truth of God's Word. As Jim and Lou finished retelling
their conversion story, they expressed deep gratitude for the persevering
prayers of the people in the Bend that brought them into a right relationship
with God.
Lou is joining other Benders in the local Nonagenarian Club which I think has four members. She lives in the Bend on the farm on the Arkansas River where her husband was born. Blessings to you, Lou, on reaching this 90th milestone.
Thank you for the memories an the love
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