The Three Ellas

I originally wrote this Gates family story in 2009. I choose to post this reflection in honor of Great-Aunt Ella Passingfair Gates Carter Meyer, one of my grandfather's sisters, whose 130th birthday will be on August 30,

The Influence of a Family

                One Sunday in our small rural church I was impacted by the continuous influence of family and its impact on each individual family member. Our tiny church observed an old tradition of weekly birthday recognitions and in turn, the birthday honorees contributed to the Baptist Children's Homes. Children were especially excited to approach the miniature birthday house and deposit their birthday offerings in the slot at its back. Then the entire congregation sang a birthday blessing to the one celebrating the birthday.
                My eighty-nine-year-old father directed the congregational singing during worship services and also led the birthday recognition blessing song. One Sunday an ecstatic little three-year-old bounced up to the front making a beeline for the birthday offering bank. Little Ella, a bright, observant child, knew exactly where to put her paper money. She encountered a bit of difficulty when she realized she had the bill folded too many times, and it was too thick to fit into the slot. She quickly unfolded it and slipped it into the “birthday house.” Ella Kay then eagerly stepped onto the stage beside Dad. Frequently he had to persuade younger children to come onto the stage to make them more visible to the congregation. Even at the age of three, little Ella already had confidence in and a trusting relationship with her great-great uncle who also just happened to be a leader in her church. She also had attended church so much that she was very comfortable and at home in that setting.

Ella Kay Murphy with her mother, Joni
Jean Gates Murphy taken in 2008.

                As I sat at the piano playing the accompaniment to the birthday blessing song, observing my father at age 89 standing by Ella Kay who had just turned three, I was struck by the power of the moment and how far back it stretched into time long past. My father’s oldest sister was also named Ella.  I could not help thinking of how many times they had stood side-by-side working, walking to school, or playing. More importantly in a figurative way, at times of family tragedy, and times of joy, the family stood arm in arm  supporting each other. Even though my aunt is deceased, her vim and vigor, her extravert tendencies, and her willingness to serve were being perpetuated in the life of Ella Kay. Floating back into my memory from the dark recesses of my mind was the remembrance of Aunt Ella telling my mother how impressed she was with the Oklahoma City Baptist Children's Home, and to think, thirty years later little Ella Kay was contributing to the very same worthwhile cause.

Ella Edith Gates Bledsoe, my father's
oldest sister.

Ella Passingfair Gates Carter Meyer born
on August 30, 1884.

                 In a reflective afterthought, I recalled a third Ella, my Great-aunt Ella for whom my aunt was named. How overwhelming to realize she preceded little Ella Kay by four generations! She was an accomplished woman with a career outside the home far before it was acceptable for women to occupy that role. Yet her intelligence, logical thinking, and willingness to study made her an excellent student of God’s Word, His ways, and of life in general. 
                May we as families pass on to the younger members the character of our ancestors, their passions and their deeply internalized beliefs. These principles guided and steered the family unit through rough times. These time-honored truths buoyed them to rise above the storms in life that attempted to capsize and sink the influence and good name established by the previous generations.  May we seek to train tiny ones like Ella Kay to guard, protect, and emulate the role models of those who have gone before us.  I will treasure the moment when the youngest member of our family in our church stood stalwartly next to the oldest member of that same family united in purpose, heart, and love.